Being forced to stop through burn out created the time and space for what I had repressed to begin to surface.

I met my inner child and the tsunami of emotion I had buried under my well-formed mask of being strong and confident and behind my pattern of being the one to always help others. 

I was finally facing the Truth and began to see how the men I were attracting were simply reflecting how I felt about myself, why I was unfulfilled and why I had not healed my body. 

I saw how the personal development industry had formed in me a strong and empowered mind, yet did not touch my shielded heart and the unconscious trauma I had buried in my body. It had taught me to bypass my emotions and bandaid them with a positive mindset. This practice of spiritual-bypass created further fractures within my own self and ended up taking me further away from my true self. 

My goal-orientated-success-driven self had me living in my masculine, driven by the belief that I was alone and had to do it all by myself. I was ready to go within, heal my heart and surrender into my feminine. 

I delved into somatic-based Inner Child work and Sacred Feminine Arts and became qualified in the Art of Feminine Presence. Awakening my feminine felt so good and completely spoke to my soul. 

This led to the birth of my next business, Path of the Goddess. I began supporting women in the deeper emotional healing and feminine awakening that I had just experienced. I created the most sacred spaces where they could purge their unhealed emotions and sink their exhausted selves back into the love and safety of their own feminine soul.

Sharing this work unlocked something sacred within my soul, and I yearned to be a vessel for the Divine. I believe it was this genuine soul yearning to go deeper and to fully awaken that drew into my life my next Mentors. I began a womb-awakening pathway of feminine embodiment based in a Christ Consciousness lineage. 

This somatic-based work resulted in very deep emotional healing and brought me out of dissociation and into connection. It supported my embodiment completely and was exactly what I had needed to move beyond the protective layers of pride and arrogance that were protecting the deeper wounded aspects of my heart.

During this time, I was taught how to go within, how to access the causal layer and heal the deepest of wounds.

I was humbled through this journey and began to surrender.  

This journey took me around the world to the South of France, Egypt, Turkey and Greece, exploring sacred sites and ancient mysteries. Yet despite all of this seeking, and detailed long daily practices, I never felt God and I continued to struggle with my health. 

During this time, I fell pregnant and I experienced the conscious pregnancy and home water birth that I had dreamed of. 

My pregnancy and birth was a profound initiation into my feminine.

Birthing my Son cracked open my heart and soul in a way that no other course or Teacher could have done. 

My focus shifted away from my work to a more internal space and I began to slow down and become much more present with myself and my baby. 

I continued to go within and practice both reparenting the various parts within me as well as releasing the emotions from my body. 

My hardened and frozen places softened, and I gradually dissolved my control, defence and protection mechanisms, walls and barriers, and opened my heart. This de-armouring was a gradual process that unfolded in stages and over time and was very much supported by the initiation of Motherhood.

The more I transmuted the emotional energy from within my body the more my symptoms healed.

This process was very much a death process.

As the layers dissolved, who I 'thought' I was, also dissolved. It was a very uncomfortable period of my life, as my safety had previously come from me controlling life. Now, I was being asked to let that go, and totally surrender into the abyss of the unknown in order to come into a deeper level of trust of self and life.

As I dissolved the protection mechanisms, I had no idea who I was or what I wanted, and a feeling of uncertainty emerged in relation to my work and business Path of the Goddess. 

This period of my life was very insular. I pulled right back from socialising and social media and went deep into my cocoon with my soul and my baby. So much was unravelling and dissolving and any part of my life that had been birthed from these false or more outer aspects of self, also had to dissolve. Therefore, the time came when I felt to dissolve Path of the Goddess. This was one of the hardest decisions of my life. It was a decision that I didn't quite understand at the time, yet knew in my soul had to be done.

After 8 years working diligently with my inner journey of Somatic-based emotional healing, I healed a Mother wound, childhood, birth, prenatal, ancestral and a lot of past life wounding.

Gradually, layer after layer, fragment after fragment, my soul landed in my body. This was pivotal in terms of how I felt.

I felt truly whole. This was my first sense of coming home to my true self and the desire to process my emotions daily came to a hault as i felt that something had been completed. 

The next stage of my journey was God-led and taught me about spiritual warfare, demonic oppression and the true freedom that is experienced through Christ.  

Despite 10 years of personal development which did nothing for my healing and 8 years of somatic healing that did actually help me and brought me out of dissociation and into wholeness, there were a few issues remaining for me that Somatic Healing and the hundreds of sessions I'd had with other practitioners were not able to help with. 

• I had grief that seemed endless. I had sat with it for 8 years and it still felt as deep and endless as the start. 
• I had voice challenges and physical constriction around my throat, voice and neck.
• I had fatigue which was the result of me living in a chronic freeze response. I felt heavy every day and only had enough energy to do the basics of life each day. This was the hardest and had been a pattern since I was 15 years old. 
• And despite the 20 years of seeking, there was still a part of me seeking....something! 

This next stage of my journey was highly unexpected and what I call a plot twist! 

It began with a healing session in September 2022 with a Mentor where I connected with God. In that session I bawled my eyes out with a feeling of relief. I could feel in this session that what I had been seeking was God! I felt like I had come home truly. 

In this session, it felt like God had picked me up and placed me on a entirely new timeline. I could feel that what was ahead of me was light, goodness and vitality. All the things I'd been seeking for 20 years. I quickly felt the power God had to bring light into my life and transform me in a way that nothing else could. For the first time in my entire life, I was being supported and I no longer felt alone.

For many months after that session, I would be brought to tears with feelings of "I'm so sorry God" as I moved through a very organic process of repentance. 

Then, over a period of 18 months, God lead me into the completion of those above issues. 

It turned out that those remaining issues were all the result of demonic oppression; of spiritual attack. I did Christian-based courses and read many Christian books educating myself about this as the Churches I tried attending didn't seem to know much about this and didn't seem to want to know about it. I sought out Christian Pastors who worked in the field of deliverance and learnt as much as I could.   

I learnt that Christ is the only one that has jurisdiction, authority and power over the Kingdom of Darkness to free us of demonic oppression.  And so through this process of becoming a Born Again Christian and learning to close doors to the Kingdom of Darkness, I was freed of the fatigue, the attacks on my voice and the grief which turned out to be a spirit of depression. For the first time in 20 years, I was able to begin exercising. 

I learnt that the spiritual world is more real than the physical and the physical world is a manifestation of the spiritual. If we want to work at the root cause, then we need to work at the spiritual level first through Christ. I learnt that many of what we call 'Mental Health' issues are actually spiritual and I learnt that most people's problems are also spiritually rooted and the result of our disconnection to God, the Living Loving Source of all Creation.

I learnt that we live in a fallen world run by dark forces (which explains everything really) and the real root of our problems personally and collectively is the disconnection to God that Christ reconciled us to. 

God is Love. God is light. And this Love is what we are actually all seeking, whether we are aware of it or not. Love is what heals all wounds. I have no doubt that if I would have found God earlier, my healing journey would have been much much shorter! However, I can see that I needed to be humbled first in order to come to God and be able to truly surrender to God's will rather than my own. This has been THE single hardest thing for me. I am naturally a rebel! Therefore, I can see why God guided my 20 year journey to get here. It refined me, and softened all my hardened places so that I was receptive to God's gentle yet powerful love. God gives us free will so it's us that need to choose God. God is always there. 

The aim of this game is to become more like Christ...the embodiment of Love. 

When we are receiving the light of God into our body, we grow to become more like Christ and we become part of a divine plan that is founded in love, harmony, unity, peace and abundance. This is the true journey of awakening that I had been seeking.

For awakening to occur we need to be plugged into the source...God through Christ. We can be a small light on our own, however when plugged into God and surrendered to His will, we are filled with his Holy Spirit and we can be on fire with and for God. 

Satan however presents as an Angel of Light and so we are deceived in so many ways by spiritual pathways and practices that we think are of the light that might help temporarily but never free us completely. This includes the many spiritually-dead Churches who have been invaded by Satan preventing true healing and freedom through Christ. Discernment is key. 

As I deepened with Christ, my eyes were opened to the many ways I had been deceived by the forces of darkness that rule this Earth. There were many things that I had explored in my healing journey that I had thought were of the light, but were false light and actually demonic in their origin and that I have since renounced. 

I had come to the journey of Christ already very awake to the deeper agendas occurring behind the scenes, however this opened my eyes on a whole new level and God continues to reveal more and more to me as I seek Him further. The deception runs so deep. 

Part way through 2024, God then began to send me clients who had demonic oppression happening and it became clear that God wanted me to begin having conversations with my clients about Jesus. I was surprised at how open my clients were to this and I was amazed at the felt-experiences of God my clients were having and the freedom they were experiencing through developing a relationship with Christ. It even grew my own Faith to witness this!

So my work gradually and naturally evolved from pure somatic therapy into a Christ-led somatic approach. For the clients who weren't open to Christ, I just worked somatically with them. However 95% of my clients were open to God and that's how I ended up here.

In summary, I can see that my entire life I was seeking God. Creating a relationship with God through Christ has been transformational and has brought light into my family and my life and the lives of my clients. It's debunked my belief that we need to heal on our own and that we need to work hard at healing when in reality God is waiting for you to receive Him and to support your journey, your challenges, and your entire life.

There is a life of peace, ease, protection, love and supernatural miracles that awaits us when allow our bodies to become a vessel for the light of God and when we actively seek Him and learn to surrender to His will. He has the best plan. We don't need to struggle. We are not alone. And only true healing comes through Him when we open our heart. 

Love Tamika